There are a lot of people at work in schools right now doing some pretty amazing things. They are tired, overworked, feeling a multitude of emotions and often underappreciated for what they do. If you are a principal, supervisor, superintendent or someone who has a team working with you, take time to appreciate them. My challenge to you is to carve out 5 minutes to ask them how they are and tell them how much you appreciate them and what they are doing during this time. It matters. A little appreciation goes a long way.
We all need a reason to be. Maybe your reason is obvious and maybe not. It could be just around the corner and you can’t see it quite yet. Each of us will discover our own reason in our own way in our own time, So hold on tight. You have a purpose in being here.
As I enter this new chapter in my life I am making an extra effort to take care of myself physically. I have hired a personal trainer hoping to kickstart a stronger me. I have always been physically active having played sports like hockey, basketball, volleyball, baseball, ringette and more most of my life. I played lacrosse up to the age of 60. I still play pickleball which is my new love, but I have never done much in the area of weight training. As I age I know I need to ensure my body and mind are strong.
I am constantly looking at ways to improve my life and next month I begin focusing on this new area of my story, hoping a personal trainer will kickstart me off in a positive way.
I do many things that help me including my involvement in Second Chants an adult show choir.
Keeping active, volunteering and working with adolescents all keep me positive and healthy. It is never too late to start something new, so keep moving forward as we all journey through this pandemic in the best way possible.
School Counsellors -> Students -> Families ->Staff
We all need a little empathy at this moment in time. School Counsellors are a key player in providing these chats with students , families and the staff in their schools. Harvard offers some great tips on how to build empathy in your schools
Administrators->School Counsellors
I had a very wise administrator who once said to me that my job was to look after the students his job was to look after me. We all need support at this time. It is a give and take. All of us need a supportive person in our corner.
Let’s be intentional in supporting one another.
We can all :
Be positive in our interactions
Help others feel understood
Make people feel heard. You can use these creative approaches.
Even though I sometimes say I don’t, I know I do take life for granted. Living through a pandemic makes you examine and reflect on your life. I know there are too many things that I have taken for granted. What about you?
Taking living life without a pandemic in it for granted. Now, listening to the sickness and deaths and tragedies of so many around the world and feeling powerless to stop it, but doing your part as best you can.
Not being able to see your best friend F2F.
The joys of inviting whoever you want for dinner.
Spending time with family and friends and not worrying how close you are to them or of they will get sick.
Walking around freely, not carrying the worries of the world on your shoulders.
Going to work, loving what you do without thinking that what you do could lead to someone being sick or worse.
Thinking your children have finally made it in the world, only now you worry about their security and what their future and the future of your potential grandchildren will look like.
Living life the best you know how, realizing you have reached retirement, but never imagining how the world would turn out in your lifetime.
The joys of having a girls weekend or a shopping trip or other small pleasure that you like doing..
The simple pleasures of going to a farmers market.
The small mundane things that are no longer mundane.
Life as you used to know it and so many other things that you still take for granted.
While these and many more things can be difficult , I choose to embrace every day and remember I can live life in the best way possible given some of the things I took or take for granted. I will seek out ways to enjoy what is, as it is for today.
1. I will face this school year with strength and demonstrate my leadership skills. I will lead from my heart with courage.
2. I will bring my best to school each day helping as many students as possible, wherever and whenever possible.
3. I will live just for today helping students and staff while taking care of myself.
4. I will radiate confidence, strength and hope in all I do.
5. I will be brave and model bravery for my students and staff.
6. I will practice being grateful each day as I enter the school building or my workplace wherever that may be.
7. I will look at all the possibilities and opportunities this time offers me.
8. I will open my heart to the staff and students I work with focusing on their strengths.
9. I will celebrate all that is right in my school and in the world.
10. In my words, actions and deeds, I will let go of fears and embrace love, joy and hope. I know that being a School Counsellor is what I am meant to do and be.
Especially during this time everyone will have a story of how they got through Covid19 or what happened to them , a family member or friend.
Our role as helpers will be to listen and support, no matter the story. It won’t necessarily be easy as sometimes we may be triggered when listening to others. We are not perfect, I know I am not that’s for sure. I want to give myself an extra dose of compassion at this time as I too have had a range of emotions. Maybe you should too.
We are humans and our humanity makes us people who are often complex. Being the best person we can be is a lifetime venture, filled with many bumps along the way. Through this pandemic many will have gigantic bumps to deal with, my heart goes out to those that do.
As you and I both navigate this chapter in our lives may we do it with courage , grace , compassion and help others along the way that are struggling to the best of our ability, because everyone has a story that they may or may not be willing to share behind the smile..
Living through a pandemic is different for each of us. Your feelings are neither right nor wrong. They just are. It’s ok to talk about and share your feelings. Acknowledging your feelings is essential to your well being. Below are a few feelings that you may be able to relate to. It’s not all doom or gloom.
How you may be feeling:
Adaptable You feel that you can roll with whatever happens.
Anxious, afraid, or feeling a bit of panic that this fall may cause an increase in infections. Or that someone you care about may now be put in harm’s way when they weren’t before.
Angry or feeling frustrated that some people may not be following the pandemic health rules. Or that the measures in place aren’t enough. Or that you have to look after so many people, your children, your parents, your siblings, others and you may have to work too. Where is the time for you?
Brave You know that you have what it takes to deal with a crisis.
Courageous doesn’t mean you aren’t afraid, but that you have the capacity to see clearly and self soothe. It takes courage to be with things the way they are. You feel courage.
Conflicted You want to socialize more, but feel that you should still stay at home.
Confident that you have the coping skills to assist you during this time.
Distrustful of how the government is handling all the guidelines and rules or how things are being portrayed in the media.
Determined to live in the present and move forward towards your goals.
Grief for a multitude of reasons.
Grateful for so many small things.
Happy you are surrounded by positive people either virtually or face to face.
Hopeful You acknowledge that the virus is serious, but you will get through this pandemic in the best way possible.
Loved by your family. So happy you have them to support you.
Powerless like you don’t have any control or say in anything that’s happening.
Protective of your routine you do not want to deal with any more change or uncertainty.
Positive You get up every day and make the best of your life in a pandemic.
Reluctant to rearrange events like celebrations, get-togethers, parties that couldn’t happen during the pandemic
Realistic You know that this pandemic isn’t easy, but feel self-assured you have what it takes to get through it.
Uneasy about some of your relationships that have changed during the pandemic.
Useful You feel like you have been able to contribute in a positive way during this pandemic.
Stigmatized or that others may avoid you You may have already had coronavirus, or others think what you do makes you more likely to spread the virus.
Secure and safe You know people are around you that support and help you.
Stressed about a lot of things like …
Under pressure to return to school/work when you can’t, or when you feel it’s not safe to.
Unsupported You may be asked to go back to school/work without having access to things like personal protective equipment (PPE), or feelings of safety and security.
Understood You have people who listen to your concerns.
Valued Most people respect how you are dealing with the pandemic.
What other feelings are you feeling ? Acknowledge them and share with a trusted confidant. You can also check out some strategies to help here.
Your feelings are important. Each child, teen and adult will react differently based on numerous factors. My hope is that no matter what happens you have the supports and coping skills to overcome whatever challenges come your way, it starts with acknowledging your true feelings.
This year more than any other year we will all need to take a mental vacation. Maybe you will need to take one hourly , daily or weekly whatever works for you.
Turn on a YouTube video with calming music. You can find one here in my virtual calm room. Then lay back in a comfortable space. If you are doing this from home make sure your space is a positive place for you to feel comfortable in. You may want to spice your working space up a bit . Add flowers and visuals that bring you joy.
Then close your eyes and breathe using the box breathing method. Think about a place you love and that feels safe for you. Personally , I always go to the beach in my mind. It might have something to do with all the summers I spent on beaches. I love the smells and the sounds of water. I picture being on the beach and waving my arms around in complete joy with a big smile on my face, but you do what works for you.
Take that mental vacation whenever you need it and ask anyone you want to join you in that space or just be by yourself and feel all the feels that make sense in the moment.
Counsellor Talk : Creative Collaborative Connections 